powerful | soft

spreading like words you burn through your eyes on what should not be.

the sun is shy to go away so it does ever so slowly... quick enough to take the hint. I look at someone else's eyes as soon as they don't know I'm doing it. It's scary to feel lost in someone's truth when you want them. A deep irrational fear of losing the faint veil I still have left, the very last wall albeit a thin one.

the way the light bounces back, the depth of valleys and mountains right around the pupils, the contrasts or lack of them. They all show an entire world that I deny invading as I try to protect my own just the same.

and then you find some eyes that are... forbidden. They cannot lie and you feel stripped down to the very core of your being. You could run, you could hide, you could turn away but it would be too late, always too late. "Never looked directly to the sun" was always a ridiculous idea to me - how mesmerising is to close your eyes and try to follow those big balls of light? When is it not fun? We stop doing it when we grow up for the same reasons we do little else that is an exploration - fear, overthinking, rationalising, consequences.

my consequences are, apparently, dipping in and out of the water the same way I dip in and out of view, the same way I want to focus on all the details of someone else's eyes but I'm afraid of doing so.

like everything else. Dichotomy in paints and inks are just duochromes - it's in them we find a way to keep eyes focused on the disparity of fear and courage, empty and fulfilling, truth or veil.

without any caution, it's always in and from the eyes... [read more]

when I hear a sound or melody that composes a photography-like memory I so desperately try to forget but make sure I never truly won't. I felt a drop on my left hand and only after the sensation did my brain tell me that I was crying.

the eyes always know best. As long as you don't overthink them and see them for what they are - another mechanism part of the skin and bones that we call "us".

or a sound or melody that feel so pleasant that it enriches you with the energy you weren't aware you needed - and you can cry just the same, it's a wonderful quality to have!

for the longest time I did not comprehend other humans crying happy tears, it did not happen for me in the best of moments - I was always puzzled yet jealous...

something in me broke - I'm so joyous that it did! - and now I use the same codes for utter joy and utter sadness. Tears.

because water is life... it cleanses, it creates, it soothes, it surrounds, it embraces, it allows you to survive.

cry it all away.

the good the bad the neutral the hate the love the confusion the understanding the fear the surrender

all. away. with water... and then try again to look at someone's eyes and maybe you'll feel less shy, knowing they share so much.

[/read]

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sukmhmt

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oh the lack of irony...